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THERMODYNAMICS OF HELL The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with his colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
BONUS QUESTION Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant.
However, one student wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that, "In order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume in Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added." This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Teresa Banyan during my Freshman year, "that it would be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you ," and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze. The student received the only "A" given.
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It's bad enough that I get this shit in my email, but now, Hauseridiot is POSTING SPAM. Jesus Christ, get a fucking clue.
Posts: 559 | From: Blaine, MN | Registered: Oct 2000
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And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three. No more. No less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then, lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it." Posts: 620 | Registered: Oct 2000
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would the softness and malability of a copper " bb ", work to fill the gaps in my ring and pinion?? i was going to add a 200 count package to the rear diff/axel, along with new gear oil, hoping this might cure the " noise " that seems to be originating in the rear of the vehicle. do you have any thoughts on this??
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if your travling at 45mph how many cfm of air is your truck using in 1000 kilometers?
Posts: 771 | From: Farmington | Registered: Oct 2000
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I would try titanium shavings in your diff or possibly adamantium. This way the ring gear after being reinforced with the shavings would last longer than with copper.
It would be like your own little titanium plated differential.
You could also try platunum. But make sure to install a chrome diff cover after using this. Ther Chrome shell has many advantages.....
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Due to popular demand I will be re-activating the "Ask Martin" forum......
Posts: 5484 | From: St. Paul, Mn | Registered: Apr 2002
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Hee Hee Hee! It's 1:17 AM and the Unemployed Engineer can't sleep! Ooh, questions that test Engineer's knowledge, eh?
Hrmm.
Copper BB's in Differential to reduce noise:
Eh, no. Won't work. Try bananas, including the peel. Thickens the gear oil enough to reduce the noise. (Trick from mechanics Down Under...)
45MPH truck, how many cfm of air are you using in 1,000 km:
Depends, are you asking how many cubic feet per minute of air the carb is ingesting at that speed or are you asking how much air in total is ingested for that 1,000 km? (An African or European Swallow?)
IIRC, we're talking about a Suzuki Samurai. 1600cc engine. Assume 31" tires, 4.11 gears, 1.23:1 high range transfer, 4th gear (1:1). 45mph=72.42kmh=1.21kmm=1220mm. 31"tall=.79mtall=2.47mcircumference. =>493.19 tire rpm=2493 engine rpm. Say engine working at 50%volumetric efficiency (50% throttle...) =>997200cubic centimeters/min=35.22cfm
So answer one would be 35.22 cfm at 45mph given the above assumptions.
Answer two would be 29,107 cubic feet of air.
Explain how a divergent duct affects air flow and pressure:
Divergent duct = diffuser.
Diffuser would cause a reduction in air velocity and an increase in pressure.
Any other questions? Got my textbooks and references handy... -Will
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I did the math. Then answer is ZERO. A sami can't go 72kph, with any gears or any engine. Never mind doing it for 621 miles. It would collapse into a quantum singularity.
Posts: 620 | Registered: Oct 2000
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If your talking about a vehicle it is the average power at the wheels. So it is the power produced by the engine minus the losses it experiences interanlly of the engine and throughout the drivetrain.
Posts: 2331 | From: Rosemount | Registered: Mar 2001
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BTW - thanks, Chad. There are a few smartasses on the TDI forum that love to throw out terms like that to sound smarter than they actually are. Self-proclamined "internet experts", probably live in their parents' basement. Grrrr!
Posts: 402 | From: Mpls, MN | Registered: Oct 2000
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Hey Chad, how far would your spamari go up a 1% grade hill with a 3mph cross wind with a 1/2 gallon of gas left in the tank and a flaming rag for a gas cap?
Posts: 38 | From: eaganmnusa | Registered: Oct 2000
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It always seems to be the ford owners that have all kinds of pent up frustration for thoes that drive other vehicles. Maybe if you guys got a vehicle that didnt dissapoint so often you would lead much happier lives.